bleedingangel84 (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
bleedingangel84) wrote2012-05-02 08:03 pm
bleedingangel84) wrote2012-05-02 08:03 pm
Entry tags:
Blaarghh...
For some reason, I'm having a difficult time at the moment. I'm feeling kind of emotionally wobbly. I really wish I could cry, but I'm not unhappy. I just feel odd. Maybe anxious is a better term. All I know is, I have the strange urge to make myself invisible, and I really want to bleed. Sorry if that sounds confusing to anyone, but I'm struggling to decipher this myself.
One of my friends is having a birthday today. For a long time, she was the only one I trusted with myself. She knows me better than almost anyone, and I can share nearly anything with her and not feel self-conscious. She's seen my highs, my lows and everywhere in between. I know I'm incredibly lucky to have a friend like that. For nearly seven years, she's always been there for me, and she still is.
You'd think that would make me happy, and it does, in a way. I can't help feeling that I don't deserve so much loyalty. I try my best to be a good friend to her in return, but I can't help feeling that I fall short of where I'd like to be as a friend. I know I'm only human. I can't be Wonder Woman, even if I tried. I know I can't fix everything for everyone, but part of me wishes I could.
This was a really random entry, I know. My opinion of myself isn't very high right now. I just want to curl up with some comfort food and a book, and avoid the human race for awhile.
One of my friends is having a birthday today. For a long time, she was the only one I trusted with myself. She knows me better than almost anyone, and I can share nearly anything with her and not feel self-conscious. She's seen my highs, my lows and everywhere in between. I know I'm incredibly lucky to have a friend like that. For nearly seven years, she's always been there for me, and she still is.
You'd think that would make me happy, and it does, in a way. I can't help feeling that I don't deserve so much loyalty. I try my best to be a good friend to her in return, but I can't help feeling that I fall short of where I'd like to be as a friend. I know I'm only human. I can't be Wonder Woman, even if I tried. I know I can't fix everything for everyone, but part of me wishes I could.
This was a really random entry, I know. My opinion of myself isn't very high right now. I just want to curl up with some comfort food and a book, and avoid the human race for awhile.