bleedingangel84 | The day RL bit my butt

So, today has not been good. I feel like screaming at the sky. I'm worried about my father, who is sick, but who also refuses to go to the doctor. He keeps getting worse, and I'm afraid for him, but I so much want to clobber him that it isn't even funny. I won't go into the gory details of all his issues, but let me just just say that I'm feeling on the painful side of numb where he's concerned. He's made some really rotten choices in his lifetime, but he's still my daddy, and part of me still wants him to make everything alright, even though I stopped being able to count on that a long time ago. I hurt for him, and because of him. I feel horribly disloyal for saying it that way, but that my truth. I'm so tired of this.

I thank God for my family and my friends. Without all of them, I wouldn't be here. I'm sorry for putting this out here in cyberspace, but I need to get this out , before I wind up self-destructing. I'm tired of hurting like this. I need a distraction from my life.