bleedingangel84 | Actions and Reactions (Reply)

Title: Actions and Reactions

Beta: None

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Language, sex-related insults, and sexual suggestion

Word Count: 365

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction created for fun and no profit has been made.

Written for: hogwarts365 Prompt #55- “This is not my life.”; Records; Elder Wand

Notes: No offense intended to anyone with the writing of this story. Just a random bit of a thing inspired by this week’s prompts. Feel free to tell me about any errors or give your opinions on this.

Summary: Harry and Draco intend to celebrate their engagement, but someone else has another idea.

Actions and Reactions

“How would you like to try and tame my Elder Wand, big boy?”

“You’re pissed beyond imagining if you’re trying that subpar chat-up line on Harry Potter. He is otherwise engaged, you knuckle-dragging cave dweller. I suggest you toddle off while your anatomy is still intact.”

“Well, excuse me, Mr. Hoity-Toity. You must make a terrible bottom, considering the size of the stick already lodged in that arsehole of yours.”

“I’ve transfigured people into toads for less than that. Kindly fuck off. I’m trying to dance with my fiancé.”

“I hardly believe Harry Potter would want someone as high-maintenance as the likes of you. And a Death Eater to boot. That’s plain shameful, that is.”

“I believe you heard the man, sir. I suggest you leave. And while you’re at it, keep your asinine opinions in your pea- sized brain.”

“See here, that’s getting personal now!”

“My apologies. Did you or did you not just try to chat me up with the lamest chat-up line in history, after which you insulted my lover? Get out, before we both show you just how personal we could make things.”

“All right then. I’m no fool. Call me if you ever decide you want a real man, Potter.”

“I have more than enough man right here, thank you.”

“He doesn’t deserve you.”

“That is my decision and no one else’s. I shouldn’t have to justify it to anyone.”

“Maybe we should hire this bloke to perform as a court jester at our wedding, Harry. He’s certainly proved he has a talent for foolishness.”

“This is not my life. There’s no way it can be. Perhaps I’m just a figment of someone’s imagination, and they will rub me out of existence any second now.”

“Shall we go home and put on some records and dance, love? It’s too crowded here."

“Yes. Preferably before records of a violent hexing appear in the Daily Prophet. Let’s forget the dancing. I’d rather go straight to bed.”

“Sounds promising. Unless you’re tired.”

“I’m never too tired for that.”

“Shall I give you a massage when we get home?”

“That sounds perfect.”

“We have that new edible oil.”

“Take me home, Draco. Now.”