You know, I was raised in quite a traditional family. Both my parents are devout Catholics and my mother's family especially was very religious. Yet I can't remember picking up any prejudice from them. Both my sister and I are quite open-minded. I'm annoyingly het - the trouble the men put me through, sometimes make me wish I wasn't - and I'm comfortable in my gender, but when an American friend of mine informed me that she (at the time) felt like a man her whole life and she effectively became a he - I had no problem dealing with it. It did come as a surprise, I would be lying if I said otherwise, but nothing I couldn't deal with. It's still a great human being I'm talking about and I can't see how switching between gender would ever change that. But having said that, you must understand what a massive shift in thinking your grandma already experienced in her life. Throughout most of her life homosexuality was very probably illegal and the very idea of a man living like a woman (or as she probably sees it - "pretending" to be one) or the other way around (though that's more accepted) probably seems like an attempt of fooling god-honest citizens and like a contempt of god's work, if she's religious. I'm not defending her, I think it's more than just a little bit sad that people can't get over their prejudice, but put yourself in her shoes - what would you do if someone told you that from one day to another it was alright to steal? You'd probably think they were mental and you'd be appalled, but to her it probably at least partially feels like that: she's asked to accept and approve of something that was once even a criminal activity or at least entirely morally wrong. I guess what I'm trying to say is, that it's probably not realistic to expect your grandma to change, but you can't let it depress you either. She's a reflection of her world, the world of old, while your thinking and your willingness to accept "different" as "not hostile" is the reflection of our, new era. Aren't you happy that we're the future and not the other way around? :)
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ninetydegrees
no subject
on 2015-05-27 07:36 am (UTC)But having said that, you must understand what a massive shift in thinking your grandma already experienced in her life. Throughout most of her life homosexuality was very probably illegal and the very idea of a man living like a woman (or as she probably sees it - "pretending" to be one) or the other way around (though that's more accepted) probably seems like an attempt of fooling god-honest citizens and like a contempt of god's work, if she's religious. I'm not defending her, I think it's more than just a little bit sad that people can't get over their prejudice, but put yourself in her shoes - what would you do if someone told you that from one day to another it was alright to steal? You'd probably think they were mental and you'd be appalled, but to her it probably at least partially feels like that: she's asked to accept and approve of something that was once even a criminal activity or at least entirely morally wrong.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, that it's probably not realistic to expect your grandma to change, but you can't let it depress you either. She's a reflection of her world, the world of old, while your thinking and your willingness to accept "different" as "not hostile" is the reflection of our, new era. Aren't you happy that we're the future and not the other way around? :)