Forgive me for babbling on and on, but...

Life is kinda kicking my ass at the moment. I have family members and others I care for that are sick and/or otherwise dealing with health-related situations that are not good. I am trying to stay positive. I am, I promise. I'm struggling today. I've been on the verge of frustrated stress tears all day. I'm trying to keep it together, but all I really want to do is fall apart. I honestly love my family, I do. I appreciate everything they have done and are doing for me. That being said, sometimes I can't help feeling...small. Having to depend on them makes me realize just how truely not comfortable I feel around them sometimes. I don't even know why. They aren't mean about helping me. Actually, they've been really nice and kind and good to me. I just wish it wasn't necessary. I wish there was some way to press pause on my life for a short while and just...stop everything.