Struggling

[bleedingangel84]

A/N: Trigger Warning- Graphic scenes of self injury described in poetic format. I'm having a hard time lately, but I have not self-injured lately, nor do I intend to. I just had to find a way to deal with myself, and I figured writing was less messy than cutting, so I wrote this.

Waking up to a grey day-

Feeling trapped within her skin-
animal-
wild-
feral-

Chaos brain-
anguish-
scattered thoughts-
broken dreams-

Peace comes-
on a blade,
sharp edges-
carving lines and
Xs-

Blood rises up-
in splotches-
perfectly round-
somehow calming.

She feels-
human-
for
another day.

Comments

[lyonessheart.livejournal.com]

First of all I want to bundle you up and hug you until you feel better!

Second - do you have a councelor? Someone you can talk to? And Third - this poem is a wonderful way to express what goes through the mind of cutters, I am glad you have that outlet! I understand how you feel - I starved myself, you deal with the pain differently. If you need someone to talk to - please don´t hesitate to contact me?

[bleedingangel84.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much. I always appreciate your comments and support. I don't currently have a counselor, but I do have a support forum that I belong to online, so I'm not completely dealing with this by myself. I haven't actively cut in some time, but when I get stressed or frustrated, the urges get bad. Yesterday was just a rough day, but I'm hopeful things will be better soon. *hugs* I'm so pleased you appreciated the poem, and I'm so sorry you've gone through starving yourself. Actually, I've had issues with that as well. Thank you so much for your kindness and offering support. It means a lot to me. The offer goes both ways. should you ever have a hard time and need to vent or talk, you're welcome to contact me as well.

[lyonessheart.livejournal.com]

that is good to hear that you are not alone. It is kind of you to offer support. I underwent therapy back then and have been stable ever since, although some days are harder than others, as you well know.