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The longer I live on Earth, the more I wonder if my life isn't some form of karmic retribution for something I've done at some point in my existence. I'm fighting against the darkest part of myself right now. Lately, I wonder why I'm even alive. I feel like people would be less worried if I weren't around anymore. Not that I've actually made plans to act on any of those thoughts, but I'm feeling massively self-destructive at the moment. I want to do something that would make me hurt and/or bleed. The thought of death is like a security blanket, which I know sounds sick, but it's true. Thinking about death is comforting. I think I'm going to find my bed and disappear into sleep for awhile.
no subject
on 2014-05-16 03:04 am (UTC)I know it's hard when your head is being an absolute shit to you.
Sending you so much Love and hugs and all that good stuff.
xoxoxo
K.
no subject
on 2014-05-16 10:33 pm (UTC)